YOU have to get back YOU

Divorce is something that can’t be avoided when two people no longer see eye to eye. Just wondering how come is it that when a couple divorces, it’s actually the women who goes through a lot of pain? Statistics show that between couples, it’s actually the woman who suffers more. Well yes there are some men who are also affected by a bitter divorce but mostly it’s the woman who feels desolate.

A woman invests so much when they enter a relationship. This is not to say that men don’t but let’s talk about the majority. Upon entering or even by the time a woman starts to conceive the idea of a partnership with a man, she has the tendency to give it all. Career, family and friends, some of these are sacrificed the moment the woman decides to get hitched. It is never mandatory to give up anything when you are entering marriage, but there are some who has this strange misconception that you have to give up something to be happy.

Then comes the rosy part of believing that you will be happily married and live forever and ever. Sad to say that this bubble has to burst. Not all marriages lead to the happily ever after set up. Some lead to divorce court proceedings, meeting with lawyers, and the bitter battle of who will have who and who will have what. It is a sad fact that when a couple divorces and if it so happened that the woman had been a stay at home wife or parent, the feeling of being worthless and desolate sinks in. This should never be.

YOU have to get back YOU. A huge part of yourself gets lost when you enter a relationship. Women are known to be giving too much in terms of physical and emotional ways, and sometimes tend to give away so much not leaving anything to themselves. It is also too much giving that we sometimes lose our own in this whole process of trying to maintain a balance between being the perfect partner and perfect mother to his children. Consulting a psychiatrist or a psychologist immediately during or after a divorce will help you. This will be your first step towards self-recovery. The moment you start accepting the possibility that you need help, you are on your way to faster recovery.

Do not be afraid to go out and meet friends. Remember that you had friends before getting married? You had been to the university or you had a job somewhere before meeting him. Never look down on yourself even if he was the one who filed for divorce. If he is successful now, put it in your mind that he will never be that way without you. Consider yourself lucky that you have this option to get divorced. We have the freedom to get divorced in this country. It is our right to protect ourselves from a damaging relationship. Do you know that there are even women from other countries who cannot even get out of a relationship and get divorced because of cultural restrictions? So cheer up, go and get out, your life will start happening again.